Tuesday, September 6, 2016

Nully Baby #4

Surprise! We will be blessed with a fourth Nullmeyer baby in February 2017. Are you shocked? Good, we were too! I feel like I've already been pregnant forever, but in actuality I'm just 15 weeks along.
We have been feeling a bit overwhelmed ever since finding out we will be having another baby. I don't think it's a secret that each of our pregnancies have been a surprise. But this one really threw me for a loop. It's hard when your initial reaction after seeing a positive pregnancy test is not overwhelming joy and excitement. It has taken me a while to get to the point where I am fully trusting God that we can handle 4 kids. Now I'm ready to get excited about this baby and start planning for its arrival!

This pregnancy so far has been rough. Definitely my most difficult one, in terms of how I'm feeling both mentally and physically. I've been keeping a little diary on my blog for the past few months to record how I've been feeling, what crazy symptoms I've had, etc. Here you go:

4 weeks 5 days: For the past few days nothing has been sounding good to eat. I can feel that my stomach is empty, but when I open the fridge nothing sounds good. Nothing sounds awful, but I'm just not interested in eating anything we have. Pickles honestly sound good, so I am eating some of those!

5 weeks 6 days: I've been having a lot of anxiety. I can feel my heart racing or skipping a beat or kind of fluttering a lot, especially in the morning. I've cut back on my coffee intake and I'm hoping that helps.

6 weeks 2 days: It's 9am and I'm making spaghetti for myself. I'm queasy all morning and most of the afternoon and nothing really sounds great to eat. Except spaghetti! I find myself craving protein. Pretty much anything with meat and beans sounds good. I guess the baby needs iron. This week I've been having a really hard time sleeping. I wake up a lot and I often find myself in that half asleep state, where I'm worrying about things that seem really real. This could be part of the anxiety I've been experiencing.

7 weeks: Wow, I am a mess. This past week was rough. The constant nausea is awful. I just feel like I'm in a permanent state of yuck. My food cravings and aversions are all over the place. I went to Trader Joe's and HAD to come home with pickled cauliflower, peppermint chocolates, and coconut shrimp. Every time I finish eating something it immediately sounds gross. I can't eat anything twice. I remember feeling this exact same way with Jenna....leftovers gagged me. (Maybe I'm having another girl?!) Mentally I don't feel well either. I'm experiencing some continued anxiety and I think feeling so sick is making me feel a little depressed. I can't muster up the energy or enthusiasm to do very much. I kind of just want to lay down and do nothing. I hate feeling this way.

8 weeks: Today I had my first prenatal appointment. The baby's heart is beating away and everything looks good! My official due date is February 27th. I was pretty nervous about this appointment, so I was surprised to see my blood pressure was 105/56. I spoke with my midwife about how I've been feeling, both physically and mentally. She said this is more common than you'd think, especially when the pregnancy is unplanned.

8 weeks 2 days: I had a really good day this week, where I felt like I had more energy. I was able to actually stay up after the kids were in bed and do the dishes and pack Adam a lunch. Seriously, that felt like a huge accomplishment! And then the next day I just felt awful. No motivation to do anything. My midwife is going to have someone call  me to talk with me about how I'm feeling. I'd rather not take any sort of depression/anxiety medication while pregnant, so I'm hoping talking to someone will help a little. I just feel so "off".

9 weeks 3 days: We just finished our family vacation and it did provide a little bit of distraction from feeling so awful. I had a couple days where I thought my all-day nausea was going away. But it has returned with a vengeance. I feel sick, and eating makes me feel a little better. But if I eat a slightly larger meal, I feel horrible afterwards. My heart beats fast and I feel an overwhelming urge to lie down until I feel better. I can't get the awful taste out of my mouth. I brush my teeth to see if that helps, but all it does is make me almost throw up. I don't necessarily have a tummy yet but I definitely just feel softer and pudgier all over. Another strange symptom is my heart palpitations. I have been having a LOT of them since being pregnant. They are a scary sensation and I will definitely talk to my doctor about it next week.

10 weeks: I have been SO tired these past few days. Ryan and I were talking today about how the baby in my tummy makes me feel a little sick. He said "Yea Mommy you used to do things for me, do things for Lucas, do things for Jenna, just all the time doing things. Now sometimes you just sit on the couch". Ha! I was surprised Ryan noticed because he's usually pretty oblivious to how I'm feeling. Today Adam went back to work after being home for vacation. This afternoon I absolutely crashed. I had to lie down while the kids played nearby and I literally didn't get up for almost 2 hours. I just couldn't keep my eyes open. I'm ready for my energy to come back!!

(I found this awful picture on my phone that Lucas took and it pretty much sums up our summer. Mommy on the couch about to throw up or fall asleep. Kids entertaining themselves. Ugh)
11 weeks: Ok I lied...I definitely have a baby bump showing! My stomach looks a little pudgy and it's pretty difficult to suck it in. I guess it makes sense, since the baby is supposedly the size of a lime right now! This past weekend I got a really bad headache, and I think it may have been from lack of water. I just can't drink water like I used to. It makes me so nauseous. But I'm trying. This week the nausea and fatigue were still there, but maybe not quite as much. I'll get little spurts of energy and then just absolutely crash.

11 weeks 4 days: I had another midwife appointment this week and all is looking good! She said my irregular heartbeats are likely because of the increased blood volume in my body. My racing heart, extreme fatigue, and coldness could indicate anemia, but all my bloodwork came back normal. She did encourage me to do whatever I can to get more liquids into my body. I used to be SO good about drinking water and now it just makes me nauseous. She even suggested I eat popsicles to get fluids. I'm telling you, this pregnancy is so much harder than the others! I have also been getting daily headaches these past couple weeks. I go to bed with one and wake up with one. I'm feeling pretty useless these days because I just feel so crummy most of the time.

12 weeks: I'm getting anxious to announce our news to the world. We have already shared our pregnancy with most family members and a few friends, and reactions have been mixed. I have so many secret fears about what people will think. I know it absolutely doesn't matter. This is a baby created by God for a purpose. Whether it was planned or not means nothing. I'm just hoping to get a lot of kind and encouraging feedback when we share about baby #4.

14 weeks: I had grand plans to take cute family photos to use for our pregnancy announcement, but I never found a photographer! Guess I need to forget about my idea and just announce our news this week! My nausea is mostly better, except when I first wake up. My daily headaches are awful. Tylenol doesn't work, so I just suffer through them. Another new lovely pregnancy symptom is bad skin. With my other pregnancies my skin was perfectly clear, but not this time! Most of my shorts are too snug on me now, so I guess it's time to haul out my maternity clothes this week. I'm definitely starting to look pregnant. Can't keep this pregnancy a secret anymore!

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