Thursday, October 6, 2016

Reasons Why I'm Late

I hate being late. Hate it. I'd rather plan ahead and be prepared so that I'm early. But kids change everything. Here are a few real-life scenarios that have happened over the last few weeks.

I was stupidly optimistic and thought my kids would listen when I said it was time to go.

A child hands me a large booger in the car while I'm driving, making me pull over to find a wipe.

My fully potty-trained child couldn't get their pants unbuttoned in time.

My fully potty-trained child decided to potty in their pants.

My potty-training child decides it's time to sit on the potty for 15 minutes as we are walking out the door.

One child discovers their brother has 1 more cracker in their snack bag and this situation must be rectified immediately.

Someone throws a guitar at someone's head.

Someone's missing shoe is on the roof.

My child can feel the seam on their sock.

That same child can feel the tongue of their shoe.

That same child can feel a tag in their shirt.

That same child has their long sleeves caught in their sweatshirt sleeve.

My child refuses to buckle his carseat.

My fully buckled child decides they need a drink, toy, snack, etc.

Someone hid my car keys.

My naked child decides they don't need to wear clothes today.

Someone has an invisible owie that needs 5 bandaids.

If I'm late, now you know why! Why are you late?

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